Sometimes I feel scared and alone. I’ve often felt like that, in the quiet moments of my life.
An unexplained feeling. One of my boyfriends used to say ‘scared of what?’
And I would say ‘I dunno, I’m just scared’. At the time he didn’t get that I could just ‘feel scared’ without a reason.
I feel teary right now as I think of this (I’m particularly in touch with my emotions today as I have been sick -just a common cold… but colds are good at bringing us gently to our knees).. The words that go with my tears are ‘why am I alone?’
‘Why do I have to figure out my path all by myself?’
I have been hiding out, in my last few sick days, in my nest, watching netflix, and having a rest from thinking about anything.
But actually I know that feeling scared and alone is actually an intrinsic part of who I am.
I can’t stand following anyone else.
I love doing things my way
I love flying alone like the eagle, always have.
I do feel scared and alone
And it is exhilarating
And the very best position from which to love life!
Hello world, I am about to come out again.
(As soon as my voice stops sounding husky)
And I’ve got about a billion cool ideas bursting to be expressed.